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reunions

I just got an email invite to my 20 year high school reunion. Now I feel old. I responed and said I'd come but really, why do I want to go? The only remote reason would be to claim some kind of personal psychological revenge on those who made life tough for me and have gone on to totally screw up their lives. Or maybe to show the girl that I was engaged to and who dumped me on Valentines Day, in our first year of college together, that in spite of her rejection, I have a successful life. But even that weak form of validation holds little amusement for me. Out of a class of over 1,000 there were very few I even considered marginal friends. And I've never kept up with the lives of any of them. I was more than happy to leave Northern Virginia behind and I've only returned a few times to visit old and true friends who happen to be older or younger than me.

By choice and design I was a member of a clique that pretty much every other clique looked down on or at least sideways at. I was a freak. That quasi redneck clique made up of mullet sporting Judas Priest/Iron Maiden fans, stoners, criminals and next generation flower children who hung out outside the metal shop wearing torn jeans, flannel shirts and either cowboy boots, hiking boots or moccassins, leather jackets or better yet denim or courduroy jackets with sheepskin collars. We were outcast enough that people generally avoided us out of fear or downright loathing. And that was fine with us. In a way, I think the freaks were the most accepting group of any of the cliques. While the other cliques were quick to toss out someone who didn't completely align themselves with all the stereotypical rules of the group, we accepted just about anyone. We had quasi jocks, geeks, nerds, gays and lesbians and even the occasional wannabe preppie in our ranks. We had no real hierarchy, just a loose association of people who occasionally spoke for us. The biggest thing was from the safety in numbers standpoint, we provided protection for those of us who otherwise would have gotten taken-advatage-of by all the other opportunistic cliques at that school. Other than the fact that we got into a lot of fights at Friday night football games, I think we were basically invisible to a lot of the other students and probably most of the faculty at that school. So I would imagine that if I do show up at the reunion, there will be a fair amount of people who will not even remember I was part of their class, much less be surprised at the direction my life has taken. I didn't bother with the 10 year reunion even though I was actually in the same town on the day it went on. So I'll have to do some thinking on why I would want to go to this one.

Wander

Comments

( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
chrisv
Feb. 19th, 2003 09:36 am (UTC)
I understand your reasons for being glad to be out of Northern Virginia, but I wish you were still here so we could meet and talk photography. :-)
wander
Feb. 19th, 2003 09:53 am (UTC)
Re:
Oh, I'll give you a call next time I'm in the area. I've still got friends to visit there.

W

twistedcat
Feb. 19th, 2003 12:14 pm (UTC)
My reason for going to reunions is generally to see how boring the lives of all "those" people are compared to mine. And I think it's funny to watch people try to remember who the hell I am, or better yet, to pretend that they have a clue.

Ok, so it's self-serving, but it makes me feel better about my childhood.
wander
Feb. 19th, 2003 12:29 pm (UTC)
Re:
Except for gaining about 120 pounds since then, I probably look about the same but I still doubt most of them would remember me.

Wander
carocrow
Feb. 19th, 2003 01:14 pm (UTC)
I didn't go to my 20th, that would be three years ago, now. I graduated at 16, so I really didn't fit into any particular group at all, and spent a lot of time running errands for teachers and tutoring jocks.

They might remember me; but probably not fondly ;-)

Truth be known, I had a couple of good friends there, but my best friends from high school weren't in my class; one graduated early, and one was a year ahead of me. I stood up in the former's wedding; I still get cards from the latter.

I suppose I could go to reunions, but since I didn't socialize with those people then, I can't imagine why I'd want to now. Or maybe it just hasn't been long enough ;-)
wander
Feb. 19th, 2003 02:31 pm (UTC)
Re:
Same with me on the friends thing. Ted was a year ahead and Eric was a year behind. The one person I did have a fondness for in my class became a drug dealer and was killed in a raid some years back.

Wander
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )

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Wander aka StoneBear
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