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Yahoo chick again

OK so yes, she does want to marry me and have my children. She doesn't want me to leave for Seattle because she wants to fly here to see me. She loves me and will care for me throughout my life. She can be here by Sunday even. She doesn't care that I'm living with someone or that I'm engaged. So I told her I was sterile. She asked what that meant. I told her I don't produce sperm. She told me maybe it was the women I'd been sleeping with who don't produce sperm (Yes, I'm dying here). But after I explained it, she said it didn't matter. She could have a baby with me by faith alone. I said, "You mean like an Immaculate Conception?" and she signed off. I dunno, mybe God didn't want her to reveal the secret right away.

Can you even get a Visa to come from Africa in 3 days?

W

Comments

( 26 comments — Leave a comment )
boomshak
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:11 am (UTC)
Dude, I'm rolling.

I think I have some sperm I can donate.

Wander, you may have something here... your own tribe of wives and lots of little wanderers.

You'd have to move to Utah, though.

Wow, a vow to love and care for you throughout your life! that's deep.
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:13 am (UTC)
I can't even get that much from my fiancee. And Utah just isn't for me. Too desolate and too religious.

W
boomshak
Mar. 17th, 2006 01:34 am (UTC)
AND, you can't get liquor whenever you want.

you have to post a picture of this girl.
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 03:25 pm (UTC)
She sent me an email and she lists her name as Maya Lovely which is the name of an American porn star.

W
boomshak
Mar. 17th, 2006 05:31 pm (UTC)
NICE!
sweetsongstress
Mar. 17th, 2006 03:07 am (UTC)
"your own tribe of wives and lots of little wanderers."

I was rolling at this one.

Mark, why don't you go for it? You could have your own little cult. Wouldn't it be fun? And all for the low, low price of marriage, citizenship, and having to boss around your followers. Man. I'm so glad I don't have AOL anymore--weird people would find me there, too.
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 03:30 pm (UTC)
I'm just sorry for some guy with really low self esteem that would fall for this. And marriage ain't cheap, been there, done that, took me 8 years to pay for the divorce.

She tried the baby angle first, then when it was obvious I wasn't playing she tried the "I'll come there and have sex with you without your girlfriend knowing about it."

When I explained why that wouldn't work, she flat out begged me for money. It was pretty sad there at the end.

W
sueg
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:24 am (UTC)
Can you even get a Visa to come from Africa in 3 days?

I'm sure she'd find a way with a little cash advance.
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:25 am (UTC)
She also alluded to wanting me to support her child.

W
sueg
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:47 am (UTC)
Well, that way you can all be one big happy family.
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:49 am (UTC)
This is of course the immaculate conception baby.

W
sueg
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:50 am (UTC)
Right, well, Jesus had siblings too, you know.
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:52 am (UTC)
Yeah but they were not immaculate were they? At least not according to Chris Rock.

W
sueg
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:53 am (UTC)
Only the one she has with you will be immaculate; she may bring other children to the table
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:54 am (UTC)
Ah yes. I forgot about the others. apparently somewhere along the way I've committed to bringing her to America so I can have "fun" with her and show her what America looks like. This after explaining how broke I was.

W
sueg
Mar. 17th, 2006 01:01 am (UTC)
I can't believe she's ready to take care of you forever and bear your immaculate babies and you can't even scrape up a plane ticket. Asshole.
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 01:04 am (UTC)
Plus I'm supposed to shell out $250 tonight to pay for her schooling. I'm a terrible sugar daddy. I need to take some lessons I guess.

W
ilovemypamiuw
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:35 am (UTC)
lmao
I totally called that...
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 12:40 am (UTC)
Re: lmao
yeah, it gets worse or better depending on your perspective,

W
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 01:15 am (UTC)
Re: lmao
I'm sure most people cut her off by now.

W
zahrah
Mar. 17th, 2006 01:08 am (UTC)
yah. wow.

i missed it but um, this is VERY DRAMATICAL and a little on the fishy side.

what in the hell? do i need to have a serious conversation with you or just beat you with a stick?
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 01:13 am (UTC)
Neither. Read back over the last day or so. I was on Yahoo IM and this girl messaged me and started in with all of this. It gets even worse. She wan't me to be her sugar daddy. Wants to have my babies or at least have sex wants me to pay for school. Asked me for the currency in Nigerian naira even though she says she lives in Ghana which uses Cedi.

W
green_noise
Mar. 17th, 2006 03:03 am (UTC)
hahaha!
wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 03:26 pm (UTC)
It got much much more bizzare later on.

W
redsgoddes
Mar. 17th, 2006 03:45 am (UTC)
"She told me maybe it was the women I'd been sleeping with who don't produce sperm"

*makes note to go get a sperm count....*

wander
Mar. 17th, 2006 03:31 pm (UTC)
Let me know what those results are.

W
( 26 comments — Leave a comment )