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Weekend

Today basically sucks so far. The fifth full day of Spring and we are having one of the worst snows we've had this year. It was truly nasty coming in to work this morning. Work would have been cancelled except we go on the same schedule the schools do and the big stuff didn't start coming down until after the busses started running so none of the office managers knew what to do about it I guess. Anyway, the weekend was nice.

Funny thing about relaxation. If I sit around the house all weekend doing nothing, I feel so guilty about not getting anything done. But if I go out fishing, I don't feel guilty at all. So that's what I did Saturday. I had a whole bunch of plans of what I was going to do but it only took one mention from Rob or going fishing and I was out the door and in the truck. We actually did less fishing and more driving around looking for places to go fishing. We stopped by Rob's dad's place and had a beer with Alvin and Bill while we all tried to figure out what was wrong withthe Allis Chalmers tractor. I swear it must have looked like a scene from "King of the Hill." 4 rednecks standing around with beers in their hands going, "Yup!"

Then Rob an I went down to Nolan's pond and cought some nice largemouths. Not enough for a fish fry so we let them go in Alvin's pond so we could catch them again later. On the way out of the pastrue I noticed a dead cow. The conversation went something like this. "Rob, does your dad know he has a dead cow?" "I don't know, you sure it's dead?" "Well most live cows I've ever seen aren't bloated like that and have thier front leg chewed off down to the bone." "Yup, that's a dead cow alright. Wanna kick it to make sure it's dead?" "nope, that's allright. You kick a dead cow like that and they tend to explode." "Yup!"

I don't know which is worse, seeing a dead cow or having seen them often enough, you know what happens when you kick them!

We drove around some then headed back to town to see if Robbie wanted to go out to the strip mine ponds with us. Robbie is so whipped, I swear. He was going with his wife to church for marriage counseling. I asked him how long he had been going and he said three months. I asked him if it had helped any and he said "no." So I told him he should just go fishing with us because he's get more good out of it. But we couldn't convince him. So we went on our own. Just as well I suppose because we would have had to listen to him bitch about his bad marriage the whole time.

So Rob and I went down to Doc's Dock and fished for bass some more. Didn't catch a damn thing but I think the water was still too cold because that pond is 30 feet deep or so. Went back to the house and ate some venison jerky waiting for Gwen to get home. She brought pizza and we watched a DVD and had pizza for dinner. Rob and I did some work on the planning for the North Carolina fireworks show. We wanted some different effects so we are thinking we might do a Niagra Falls, a string of 50,000 firecrackers, 20 ground bombs and a barrage of 2" Roman candles. Still a bunch of planning left to do and we still have $1700 left to spend on it. Should be fun ryl!

Sunday I actually worked. I got another fence row pulled out with the tractor and all the posts pulled from the previous work. Iworked until the rain started coming down. It smelled so clean and wonderful. But I'm glad i got that work done because the rain and snow will make the fields a mess. I also pulled in a whole elm tree that the wind storm last week had brought down over the fence. Tore my henads up on old rusty barbed wire though. Have I mentioned lately how glad I am to have gotten a tetanus shot recently?

Headed home fairly early but hit a fairly severe snowstorm in the process of getting really nasty. Took me three hours where it normallyt takes me 1 1/2 hours to get home. Did a web page fro the Bone Fire pics I took last week. They are here:

http://www.frontiernet.net/~dierker/bonefire.html

Now I'm sitting at work hoping they send us home.

Peace,

Wander

PS - the guy who they sent on the Press OK instead of me is stuck on the runway at the St. Louis airport. See, I would have been halfway to the plant by now because I would have driven.

Comments

( 22 comments — Leave a comment )
silent_rob
Mar. 25th, 2002 11:15 am (UTC)
I don't know which is worse, seeing a dead cow or having seen them often enough, you know what happens when you kick them!

I'd have to say the second one. Eew!!! I'm sure there's some perfectly sane reason you know this (well.... maybe......) but it sure makes for a bad mental picture!! Way to use common sense and not kick it.... !!!!!!
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 12:10 pm (UTC)
Re:
When i was working on this ranch in New Mexico one summer we had this swamp in front of our line cabin. I suppose it wasn't really a swamp, just a marshy place. Well anyway, this cow got stuck in it and we tried for a couple days to pull her out of there. To no avail, she finally sunk down so deep a helicopter would not have been able to lift her out and she had gone into shock anyway. So we had to shoot her. Well then the ranch headquarters was suposed to send up a couple of wranglers with big draft horses to try and pull the corpse out. So then it starts to rain and the the mud loosens up and the cow actually starts to float. After about a week, the wranglers finally get up there. Damned thing was stinking bad by then because the sun had shone on it for a couple days and it was badly bloated. So they get some ropes around it''s neck and back legs and one of our guys wades in to tighten one of the leg ropes. He props his leg against the belly and the damn thing pretty much explodes and talk about a bad smell. It was kind of like when the shark exploded in Jaws only not that violent. More like a really loud fart. So then, they try and pull what's left of it out and the head comes off. We ended up pulling it out in about 20 pieces and burning the whole thing. Still took a week for the smell to fade.

A year after I got here to Illinois one of my calves (baby cow an not my lower leg) got struck by lightning on evening. It laid there a couple days in July heat before I found it. So like an idiot, I kicked it to see if it was really dead and it exploded too. It's kinda like one of those old common sense things in farm country. Don't kick a dead cow (or any livestock for that matter) and don't piss on an electric fence. Thing is almost everyone I know, knows those things because they actually did it.

Wander
(Deleted comment)
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 01:20 pm (UTC)
Re:
Worms are the best bait of all. If you can't catch 'em on worms, they ain't worth eatin as far as this farm boy is concerned. And yes, it's a largemouth bass as opposed to a smallmouth bass which we don't have too many of around here. Basically they look the same but the largemouth has a huge mouth...I'll send you a photo to illustrate sometime. I actually have one mounted on my wall (real redneck thing to do isn't it?) The largemouth feeds by sneaking up on smaller fish and then opening it's mouth all the way which sucks in huge amounts of water and said smaller fish. It's not unusual to gut one and find whole fish, crawdads and etc in their stomachs. We generally only catch largemouth bass in our ponds though there are smallmouths and striped bass or "stripers" in the River.

Wander
(Deleted comment)
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 01:47 pm (UTC)
Re:
Dream Catcher in the living room. Mandella in the computer room. 7.5 pound largemouth bass mounted and hung in the studio. I wanted to hang it in the living room but none of the women folk would let me. I don't hunt so I don't have any heads on my walls and the fish was a big thing. Caught two feet from shore on a nightcrawler the last week of February, 1999. It just killed all the other fishermen I showed it to. Largemouth on average are anywhere from 3/4 pound to 4 pounds. Fish weighing above that are pretty uncommon to rare as the weight increases. The Illinois state record for a largemouth is 13 pounds 1 oz. So 7 pounds 8 oz is in the rare category and to top it off, I caught it in a little farm pond. So much for all the plastic and metal lures and guided trips on the rivers people swear by.

Wander
(Deleted comment)
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 02:27 pm (UTC)
Re:
Hey I know some pretty scary women around here too. Ones that would not blink about having a head on a wall. I know women that chew tobacco a pretty disgusting habit for either sex as far as I'm concerened. Deb goes fishing with us and Rob's wife Gwen too. But neither of them will bait their own hooks or take the fish off for that matter. Still it's better than women who never let you go fisihing or are too prissy to even touch the fish once it's caught.

Oh, a commercial fisherman upon seeing that large a bass would simply throw it in the boat with the other fish. Just meat to him. You are probably thinking of a sport fisherman. The guys you see on TV. Guys like me look down on guys like those. Why go fishing if you are just going to throw it back?

Wander
ryl
Mar. 25th, 2002 02:10 pm (UTC)
So when you guys were standing around saying "Yup," who was Boomhauer?

a Niagra Falls, a string of 50,000 firecrackers, 20 ground bombs and a barrage of 2" Roman candles.

Must...not...short...out...keyboard...

Thanks for reminded me I need to make a doctor appointment. They were out of tetanus vaccine last time I went. *fear*
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 02:20 pm (UTC)
Re:
Rob's dad Alvin is Boomhauer. You can't understand a damn word he say's first time around. you always have to say "huh?" Those fireworks effects are about 1/25 of the total show. I need to send you that video from last year's show. Stay calm. What size T-shirt you want?

Yeah tetanus shots are a good thing.

Wander

ryl
Mar. 25th, 2002 02:26 pm (UTC)
I think I can fit in a medium...it's been a while since I bought clothes.

When my mom's memory started slipping, she would get hung up on certain words and start saying "um....um...the....um..." We started calling that Boomhauering because she sounded like an intelligible version of him. Strange humor, but it really is funny. We all laugh when someone gets accused of boomhauering.
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 02:30 pm (UTC)
Re:
Sounds like your family would fit in well around here. Rob is very soft spoken. I mean he's a big redneck and when you get to know him he can be loud but he doesn't like casual conversations. He talks loud enough to hear himself and that's about it. So you eitehr have to listen really close or keep asking him what he said.

I'll make sure I get you a T-shirt when I go to the plant next time. Oh, and you get to wear a fire helmet.

Wander
ryl
Mar. 25th, 2002 02:42 pm (UTC)
We're a good Lutheran family. Prairie Home Companion-type stuff. We can all blend into the background when necessary.

Oooooh a fire helmet! My sisters are going to lock me up for insanity. Yes they will. But they have chilluns to watch for and I don't.
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 02:47 pm (UTC)
Re:
You will understand the utility of the helmet when burning fallout rains down upon your head. It makes a pleasing little "doink" sound when it bounces off your helmet. Much more pleasing than the sound it makes when it lands on your unprotected head. Oh and you will need an old 100% cotton long sleeved shirt that you don't mind if it gets tiny burn holes (badges of honor) and blue jeans.

Wander

ryl
Mar. 25th, 2002 02:49 pm (UTC)
the sound it makes when it lands on your unprotected head

I'm guessing this would be along the lines of "Son of a bitch!" or sizzling brains?
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 02:55 pm (UTC)
Re:
They really don't burn for long. in fact you never really notice the burn holes until after the show. Sometimes if you get one under your collar you feel a sting but you are usually to busy to do any more than pat it out. We've never really had a serious burn. We have caught people on fire but nothing real serious. That's the reason you go with 100% cotton. It burns rather than melting synthetic fibers into your skin. Sounds lovely huh? I'll show you my shoot shirt when I get there. It's got a couple good burns. it sounds a little scary but it's really nothing to worry about. You gonna invite your better half? Or is that the weekend of the pickle festival?

Wander

ryl
Mar. 25th, 2002 03:02 pm (UTC)
Dang! I knew I forgot something Saturday! I meant to ask him if he could come. Being Mr. Chemistry, he'd probably love it. Did he ever tell you about the firecracker lab last year?

Catching people on fire...okay, leave work at work. Stupid omens in 1.3. Out of my head I command you!
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 03:14 pm (UTC)
Re:
We can always use an extra spotter or two but if I can manage it, I'll let you light something. Especially if you help us do the set up during the day. The 50,000 firecracker string is notorious for going out mid string. Actually the force of the explosions blows the string apart so we are thinking of tying them to an upright post and laying on this stuff called sticky match. it's basically black powder stuck to a long piece of clear tape and burns at about 10 feet per second. That would make sure it all went off but it might all go off at one too. So that's something we'll be trying to figure out. Among other things. Should be fun.

Wander
ryl
Mar. 25th, 2002 03:21 pm (UTC)
That sounds very very cool.
wander
Mar. 25th, 2002 03:25 pm (UTC)
Re:
Luckily we are not doing a Poisonous Spider cake. They frequently break out the side and shoot little flaming zingers at all the team members. But we may be doing a 100 shot Magnum load Thunder King. One of the loudest effects you can get short of mortars. It's always a fun show to do anyway. Plus the staff feeds you for free. Free food is always a plus.

Wander
ryl
Mar. 25th, 2002 03:35 pm (UTC)
Wouldn't it be great to be the person who names fireworks? "Poisonous Spider Cake" sounds like a mystery novel to me. "Thunder King" would be a great name for a racehorse. The only thing more fun to name would be drinks and there you're kind of restricted to the porn star and wrestler-sounding names.
wander
Mar. 26th, 2002 08:59 am (UTC)
Re:
I named a drink once. The St. James Tropical Rum Surprise. What went into it each time was as much of a surprise to me as it was to the customer. I know a guy who hase fireworks named after him. His name is Jim Freeman and he came up with the idea for Freeman shells. These are 6-10 inch mortar shells shaped like big salamis which have multiple aerial efects in each shell and a very loud report. So we know if we are lightinga show and the person loading says #6 is a Freeman, you light it and get the hell out of the way.

Wander

namaste21
Mar. 25th, 2002 06:03 pm (UTC)
I actually knew that dead bloated cows could explode, but that's because of Hurricane Floyd. We worked with an emergency response team through the School of Public Health answering phone calls from citizens in Rocky Mount/Princeville/Tarrboro who were in need. One phone call inquired as to how to get a dead, bloated cow out of a tree (the floods had left it entangled in the branches). We had to figure out a way to remove it without the darn thing exploding.
wander
Mar. 26th, 2002 09:00 am (UTC)
Re:
That must have been a delicate operation. Persoanlly I would have made it explode then pulled down all the pieces. Easier that way.

Wander

namaste21
Mar. 26th, 2002 09:20 am (UTC)
Well, we were working with the state health director, and I believe the concern was, with the cow previous being soaked in flood waters, that this would bring too many pathogens (bacteria and viruses) into the area, which was residential. Of course, now that I think about it, there were already enough dead pigs, cows, wildlife, etc. in the area it probably wouldn't have made a huge difference.

I believe they called in a bulldozer and tried to pull it into the scoop. I wonder how it came out. (I was, after all, answering phones and redirecting health workers, not actually cleaning up myself.)
( 22 comments — Leave a comment )

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Wander aka StoneBear
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